Coping with Working Life

I've been feeling so troubled.

So troubled that I wish I could properly explain what's been going through my head.

First, it's lacking the interaction with friends. Don't get me wrong, I have a close friend at work with whom I'm supposed to behave professional with because we're in a workplace. As much as I'd love to chit chat with her, she has to focus on her work, hence I give her some space.

I remember when about two weeks ago, I've been asking a friend to come and have lunch with me. Although I wanted to save money and cut lunch spendings by having a packed lunch, it's always nice to have lunch with someone. Whenever I had lunch with a friend, I would come up to the office and became a more cheerful person at work. I was happier; it's nice that just seeing a familiar face boosts my confidence slightly better. I didn't care if my boss or colleagues noticed.

So when some of my friends are starting to go back to the UK, it just saddens me a bit to know that I'm left behind here. The friends that I have grown up with have moved on with their lives, working full-time, studying outstation, or just being busy doing other stuff. As much as it's nice making new friends, I've missed my old friends, the ones where I can be myself with so easily.

I know it may sound selfish, but maybe it's because I miss someone looking out for me, maybe thinking about me. In UK, I have friends who would call me up out of the blue and ask how I was or what am I up to. Some would even drop by at my place and ask me to hang out with them because they're bored.

Or at least someone calling me up, just to say hi and give moral support for work.

Because all I could do for one day would be, go to work, do work all day, then go back home, have dinner, do a bit of work and then sleep.

Secondly, as much as I'd like to have lunch with my colleagues, I do not wish to have lunch with people who smoke on the table. Some may be able to tolerate smokers, but it's time that I have to put my foot down. Perhaps I should say, "May I have lunch with you? Oh, and could we eat inside, please?"

So rather than confiding about what I'm going through to someone, and getting the 'suck-it-up-and-grow-up' speech, I just let it all out here. I know that times like these makes you grow tough, but in this bug-eat-bug world, it'd be nice to see a little soft spot in some people once in a while. I mean, God didn't exactly made us to be hard-rock, right? We're squishy for a reason.

To those who think I'm whiny, well, maybe I'm just not as tough as you. Too bad. I know how tough working life can be, but it always helps that God has taught me to be patient and humble and not swear.

PS: I'm still craving for Snowflake dessert, dang it.